Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Whining Wednesday is Back - just for a split second though - so don't blink

It's nice to be thankful, but sometimes you just need to whine a bit...

Whine 1 - It is way too cold here.

(and by here I mean the entire world it seems

and in particular my bedroom which hubby likes to keep at a bone-chilling 58 degrees

although our huddling together for survival in the middle of the bed in the dead of night is probably one reason we have managed to stay married all these years)

Whine 2 - The mall during the holidays

(I could probably stop right there and you would all know what I mean)

But in particular, let's just say I spent 30 minutes of the very last hour of the very last shopping day of the season

(not Christmas Eve, I am not quite that lame)

trying to save my Bubble Tea Lady from demise at the local mall where they are out to evict her or at least I spent 30 minutes listening to her whine about it- I find listening to other people whine to be a bit draining, don't you ....

(so, anyhow- if you have a couple extra minutes email the management at the Monmouth Mall and just casually mention how much you like the Bubble Tea Lady)

And then I made the mistake of walking into Sephora for stocking stuffers

(ie gifts for myself)

which meant I spent another 30 minutes of the very last hour of the very last shopping day on a stool as their almost-perfect sales associate tried gamely to pair each of my facial imperfections with a neatly packaged product designed to make me look more like her.

She spoke in a soft voice I had to strain to hear and had the slightest hint of an accent, reflecting some sort of exotic heritage or maybe a summer as the hostess of the Olive Garden next door.

"You could benefit from what we call an eye brightener," she said, pulling a $28.00 white crayon thingie out of her pocket, "because you look like a dead fish".

OK, she didn't really say that last part, but it was kind of implied ....

When little miss almost-perfect turned to greet another customer, I bolted for the back corner of the store to erase some of her handiwork and it was there that I saw the star of my most favorite poorly written crime drama - advertising the only product in the store that I desperately needed.

Oh yes girls, I'm now proudly wearing a long-lasting shade of lipstick named for Mariska Hargitay, giving me the power to stay smudge free through the longest kisses (hubby's 58 degree nights do have some positives) and the greasiest of french fries (I might just have snuck back to Sonic again). I think it also allows me to carry a concealed weapon and arrest anyone who looks kind of rapey, but I'm not sure.
my lips sort of look like this now ------>>


Whine 3 - I don't want to get organized.

I feel like I am under alot of pressure to 'get organized' or at least to want to get organized after the holidays. I mean, I actually do want to be organized, but I don't want to get organized.

(do you see the difference?)

I am just way too lazy right now.

(I think it is the cold)

Maybe next month which is my birthday month and always feels like the new year to me anyway.

Yup, next month I will be a ball of energy and whip this place back into shape ... and oh, yes, I am thinking of legally changing my name to Mariska so I don't get into any trouble over this concealed Uzi .....

7 comments:

Amie McCracken said...

Cold makes me hyper, that's why I love winter. It's hot that makes me lethargic. But I completely understand the wanting to be organized; it's the getting there that's annoying.

Michaela Dawn:Windy Woman said...

This is a fine idea, to get the obvious annoyances out of the way for a day... it's cute and I suppose it's beneficial to be sipping some wine while we read this whine... gets the laughing kicking even harder:)


M

Olivia said...

Laughing...Thanks for the whining. It makes me feel better about the long list that is always waiting to be whined in my own head!

B said...

I'm in a whining mood myself today.

Oh, and I'm in search of the Organizational Fairy. When I find her and I'm done with her I'll send her your way.

Caroline said...

So agree with the organizing thing! me too!
to tomorrow...
it's always a day away!

ArtSnark said...

who needs to get organized when you look so fab! Just dazzel 'em with your new smile

CreaShines said...

I literally laughed out loud at this:

"I think it also allows me to carry a concealed weapon and arrest anyone who looks kind of rapey, but I'm not sure."

Soooo entertaining ma' dear! Keep up the amazing blogging :)