Tuesday, November 1, 2011

maybe it's better to seek out some criticism .... the kind that offers up just a little love bite though, not the kind that requires stitches

It is usually easy to find people to tell you how great your idea or thingamajiggie is and how you can absolutely sell that great idea or thingamajiggie - "they'd sure as hell buy one" they say - although they likely never will ...

(unless of course, you are in my family - the "do you really want the truth?" clan of solemn pronouncers of doom and gloom, yes - that's where I get it)

sometimes though - it is best to ask people

what they don't like.

So, instead of seeking approval, maybe asking, "what is wrong with this? how can I make it better?" could be more likely to get something real ... and maybe helpful ... and maybe valid.

It also requires the person who's opinion you value

(and if you don't value their opinion, then please do not ask them)

to really look and listen to what you are showing them.

You can, of course, totally disregard their answers, but if you are really looking for feedback - this approach may yield you some important talking, thinking and action points that you hadn't thought about.

(a final note about asking someone else about your work - remember an important life lesson here - you can only be to someone what they see you as - and yes, I realize I am dangling a participle here, but stay with me - what people see has more to do with what is behind their eyes than in front of them, so keep that in mind - this is not an exercise in giving your power away - but solo workers need the power of collaboration sometimes, too)

* if you're gonna shoot print by petek design

7 comments:

SummersStudio said...

Interesting. I was just thinking along these lines over the last few days. I know most of the time how I see myself and sometimes how others see me. But I would like to know more specifically how people see my business. But it is a scary sort of proposition isn't it?

zJayne said...

"what people see has more to do with what is behind their eyes than in front of them"

... no stitches from you, evaaa (that's ever with a fun inflection)

Have I mentioned lately I love making it over here to read you!

~waving,
Jane

Catherine Ivins said...

right LeAnn and I think everyone who sees you since they bring their own stuff along with them sees you differently which is why makers just need to make what they are drawn to make ultimately and stay true to ourselves even as that truth changes

waving back at ya' Jane!! xo

Lindsay {Shrimp} said...

This is SUCH a good point. We are so hesitant both to give and to receive criticism, but sometimes it's more meaningful than praise. We're so programmed to dole out compliments like candy that they can become empty. There needs to be a balance.

- Lindsay

DancingMooney ♥ said...

It's true! How can I make this better, is a hard but good question to ask! ♥ Thanks for that reminder. ;)

sheila at shecological said...

Hey Cat! Just popping by after many months and happy to see that you are still posting insightful, witty, and useful information. Thanks and hope you are well. Sheila

Catherine Ivins said...

Shheeiillaa- how are you doing on the other side of the world (sort of)?- miss you! xo