10 Lessons I Learned from 2012 ...

2013 calendar by f2images
I am starting my countdown to 2013 a little bit early because

1. I always get backed up (by orders) and sidetracked (by cheesecake) this time of year and 2. if we all ascend on 12/21/12 I want to have some of this down on paper

(or virtual paper anyway)

as actual proof that I really did come away from this amazing powerful year with some kind of insights. 

Lesson #10 - There are not enough people in my life. 

Now, I am normally a little detached - I think this comes from a lifetime of people either really liking me or really not liking me very quickly after meeting me - their feelings having no connection to how nice or friendly or kind I am to them that I can see

(I blame my Scorpio rising sign for a kind of annoying intensity and my Nell-like Appalachia/NJ upbringing).

This "not enough people" thing has come up for me in many ways over the past year. Most recently I saw an old coworker at the store. When I worked with him he talked to his wife on speaker phone eight times a day. She always sounded absolutely FRANTIC about something, and when they hung up she would shriek, "Oh, I love you so much!" Every time. In the same tone of voice I would use if George were being dragged off by the Taliban. This is the main only thing I remember about him.

He was going on and on about all these people I used to know because apparently he still knows them and I was thinking ... why are none of these people in my life anymore (of course 10 minutes into this conversation I was thinking about slamming my car door on my head which is probably another reason there are not enough people in my life - short. attention. span.).

Anyhoo, that's all I have learned at this point - no idea how I am going to get more people in my life - yes, I realize I just said "get people" the same way others might say "get a pepperoni pizza" and yes, I realize this could be part of my problem, too ...

6 comments

DancingMooney said...

Last night I volunteered, to help wrap gifts for the adopt a family's in our town. Partly inspired by getting out of the house more, and connecting with people locally, but also partly in my goal to give more locally too... Maybe you have to give to get (more people in your life)? I am thinking that might be the way for me, since we relocated and I've worked from home the entire time we've lived here, my world is otherwise pretty small, so I can totally relate. ♥

DancingMooney said...

I can relate. I love working from home but it is isolating though. We moved to Oregon almost 6 years ago, and I still feel like I hardly know anyone here, but, I've worked from home the entire time we've lived here too.

A few nights ago, I volunteered to help wrap gifts for our local community, adopt a family program, for the holidays, and it was tons of fun.

Maybe you have to give, around people, to get more people around you? (I am trying to speak your language here, haha)...

Anyways, as for me, I've been considering renting a booth space at a local boutique, where you'd volunteer hours at the store, to help keep the place running... I don't really want a job, I HAVE a job, but I do miss being part of a local group of people, and having that sort of interaction with people I've actually built relationships with, and perhaps have something in common with...

anyways. I am hoping to 'get' more people into my life, by getting out of the house and making a point to do local things, with local people. my mom and I did the local antiques & collectibles show, one Sunday a month for about a year... in the end we decided it was too much work for not enough return, but it was fun, and it's inspired me to consider looking into what else is happening around here, that fits me. ♥

DancingMooney said...

yep. I can relate. do something local, volunteer, or join the Saturday Market, or something like that... Or perhaps do something that's not work related at all, like a yoga class, (I can't do yoga, but it was the first thing that came to mind!) you know what I mean. I think it's important to have something that's a regular on your calendar, that you do with local people - regularly, every Tuesday, or once a month, or whatever keeps you feeling connected. Working from home is isolating, but that doesn't mean we don't love what we do, we just need to make a point to get out and belong to something where we interact with people on a regular basis, it's human nature. ;)

DancingMooney said...

okay I keep trying to post comments and they aren't showing up, what gives? TESTing.

Henrietta White said...

Hi Catherine - I found your website from Beads and Beyond magazine and really love your work .. as I really believe in recycling - textiles are my passion! I use lots of recycled elements in my jewellery. On the subject of people in your life ... I wish you luck with that however I have found that a few well chosen friends are worth more than lots of casual acquaintances.

Catherine Ivins said...

For some reason this post's comments all popped in today! Ugh!

Henrietta- I'm glad you found me and yes, you are right a handful or even a couple of close friends is worth more than dozens of acquaintances!

Janelle- connecting and giving locally yes, I agree. I did some volunteering after Sandy and it really stirred up the need in me to do something more and just connect with someone over coffee since my sister and best friend moved away and my daughter growing up - we live in a small, very conservative town but no doubt there are lots of people here ... give to get, yes I like that xo