2012 Affirmations - faith builders for our reluctant minds - # 1 finding solutions by staying open

I just re-started A Course in Miracles - some of you may be familiar with it. I took this course a few years ago, but like so much else in my life, it went unfinished, so I decided to start again from the beginning.

We also have some family drama which I have not really talked about on here. Some of you may have seen the video or heard the story about a homeless man being beaten up and the kids filming it and proudly putting his beating on youtube. It was all over the internet and television just before Christmas.

We even woke up one morning to see Anderson Cooper talking about it.

The man in the video is my husband's brother. He has been mentally ill, unmedicated, alcoholic, in and out of jail and homeless for decades. We had not seen him in many years.

My husband and I brought him to a rehab center in Pennsylvania on Christmas Eve for a 21 day program - he is being released on Saturday and at this point we have no idea what we will be doing when we pick him up. It is a stressful, crazy time.

Probably part of the reason that little blue book showed up in my life again.

So, I am starting my 2012 affirmations by affirming that I create wonderful solutions by being open to new ideas.

I focus on solutions instead of problems - I choose to see every problem as an opportunity.

Affirmations are a wonderful way to speak abundance into our lives. They are the faith builders (and I am not talking religion here) that encourage our hearts and coax our reluctant minds of the truths that are larger than the life we have experienced in the past.

So rather than focus on the "problem" which keeps us tangled in the energy of "problem"

(which might work if the problem is small and easy to fix, but this focus just seems to make big problems even bigger)

we focus our attention on opening our hearts and minds to the possibility that something or someone can bring about solutions that are greater than anything we can imagine when we are mired in the problem. We are not here to force solutions - but to trust enough to let them unfold naturally.

Trust ... letting things unfold unforced - these are not things that come naturally to me - but I am trying them on for now - the side effects are a little scary at the moment.

(and I don't usually take any medication with side effects - unless they include rapid weight-loss)

* 99 problem print by sweet perversion


KJ said...

*Sigh* I am so sorry for your brother in law, your husband, and your family. I have worked with this population and as important as your help and encouragement will be it is really up to your brother in law. I know this is late, but you might want to see if you can find a residential program that lasts a year or more for your brother in law. I found the long programs the most successful at getting past all the hurdles and instilling confidence and new habits.

Best of luck to all of you.

Catherine Ivins said...

thanks so much KJ - the only residential program that had space he has refused - and he has no insurance and no ID yet which seems to complicate everything - but yes, it is up to him - mental illness makes the up to him part complicated - thank you so, so much for your kind words xo

Dar Presto said...

I'm so sorry. Such a horrible, horrible thing. I'm sick about it. There is a degree of hope for your brother-in-law, but I don't think there is much hope for the two criminals.

There is a gap in services for persons with severe, chronic mental illness. There is a documented connection between the closing of state hospitals and the rise of homeless and incarcerated mentally ill individuals. The plan to maintain people in the community is a noble endeavor, one which does much good, but a lack of services for those with a certain degree of illness is a big problem.

I haven't worked in the system for over 15 years, but I believe the treatment team at the rehab, or psych hospital, or anywhere David has received services, needs to set him up with an Intensive Case Manager (ICM) or whatever this type of social worker is called these days. The ICM helps a client find services in the community, and maintains contact and a client-centered treatment plan with him. I worked in Pgh. I wish I had more specific information for your area.

I realize you know quite a bit about these things already. But for readers to know, some important tools are antipsychotic meds, Social Security Disability, intensive outpatient treatment, partial hospitalization, supported housing, disability housing. You shouldn't have to navigate this alone. Best wishes to your family.

Catherine Ivins said...

Thank you so much for all the info Dar - I actually used quite a few of your terms talking to people today and it made me sound much more organized than just screaming help into the phone to anyone who would listen. David was in a state mental hospital in the early 80's (when he was in his 20's) when it closed and he was released, his care since has not been good - I have learned so much in the last month about the lack of services here, so many people who sound so well-meaning on the phone but just sending me off with phone numbers to someone else that leads nowhere execept to more of the same- it is eye opening and truly heartbreaking- as of tonight- we are just getting him to daily AA meetings, George is bringing him to work with him- we are trading off every couple days with his sister and just trying to keep ourselves sane and afloat- everyday with him unmedicated feels like one more chance for him to take off again- thank you for your timely, thoughtful comments- I needed them. xo