the secrets of the cups - part 1 (these are not Victoria's Secret Cups but I feel the need to work those words into my title to attract more readers)

print by hair brained schemes

I've been thinking about cups.

Uh, yes, I said cups.

Empty cups and full cups and chipped cups and

that perfect cup of tea (or coffee) that smells just so and tastes just so and sits in our hand just so that when we walk into a room with that cup in our hands -

(even when that room has a sink that is filled to the brim with dirty cups, that everyone else in the house believes are cleaned by fairies - I mean they must believe this because if they weren't being cleaned by some kind of magical process, I'm sure someone would pick up a cup and wash it ... themselves ... sigh)

all is right with our world.

The cup seems a perfect metaphor for everything to me these days.

Let's start with the empty cup - you may or may resonate with this cup - it depends on which cup in the universal kitchen cupboard you are vibrating with right now - there are no rights or wrongs, goods or bads here - I only hope for your sake you are not resonating with that old Disney mug with the picture of Goofy in a racecar and the faded letters that read ... NAScaR daD.

(and it helps if you picture little Oliver Twist with his bent brim metal cup and soulful eyes imploring for more)

The empty cup is what gets our ass moving - it requires some kind of action -

now the cup doesn't need to be totally empty, of course - although for some people, and I think I may be one of them, it takes a swig of nothing from a totally empty cup

(how the hell did I not notice that this stuff in my cup - this stuff that had been sustaining me, at least in a "she's still breathing" kind of way - is ... well, gone)

to wake us up.

(yes, even when we are talking coffee here - it is the empty cup and not the full cup that wakes us up - stay with me)

When my Polarity Quit Your Day Job interview came out on the Etsy blog I got a lot of email from makers (and everyone owns this title because we wouldn't be on the planet earth if we weren't the most courageous and amazing makers in the universe, truly) - many were very drawn to the words

I made space for something new to find me.

This is the secret of the empty cup - the step away from actionable life

(and depending on your vibration the idea of stepping away from anything, even something we know in our heart is not working, can be either very alarming or very seductive - there is probably no middle ground in this for those of us who find ourselves holding an empty cup in the first place)

Now, how this cup gets emptied is a very individual thing:

defining ourselves by how much we do, putting other people first, not speaking up, being somewhere that we do not want to be, doing things we do not want to do -

the cup gets emptied by what we allow.

By the time we realize we are just sucking down air this has probably been happening for years, maybe even decades then we either create some change or more likely life creates this for us, usually in the form of some kind of loss - empty within leads to empty with-out. It has to.

(allow (inner work) + create (outer work) = well, everything actually)

My mother married her first husband when she was 21 years old. The guy she married told her when he asked her to marry him that if she said no, he was going to ask her best friend (women's friendships could be a little too competitive - they still can).

My mother thought about it.

She decided that it would be more painful to watch this guy marry her best friend than it would be for her to actually marry him herself, so she married him.

(note I said first husband)

Even when we don't know what we do want or what we do want to be doing, we still have to take action to get rid of what isn't working - this action precedes the state of allowing that is the empty cup's secret.

We can't slip into those kick-ass boots we just bought before slipping our feet out of our slippers and in between this slipping in and slipping out our feet have got to get naked - there's just no other way - well, unless we have some kind of kick-ass galoshes that fit over top of our slippers - there are never any absolutes with anything, life is tricky, folks.

But mostly this naked feet place is the empty cup place (please keep in mind the image of little Oliver Twist and not naked feet inside empty cups which will get this all mucked up for you)

In Part II we will get to the secret of the empty cup - because every cup has a secret - I think Victoria knew this first ...

(well, except maybe the red solo cup - which is probably the worst song ever written and so doesn't get one)

Next Up - Part II - the secret of the empty cup