changing something ELSE

With one retrograde after another this year, we can't totally wait for the stars to line up for us to get stuff started or make things happen.

(although definitely work with the retrograde period as much as possible by doing all the "re" work - re-evaluate, renovate, re-invent, research, etc and launch new projects with an open mind to the fact that stuff will change with things we start now and have to be re-done - this is all ok - maybe the secret to this is doing things we enjoy doing - so if we have to do them all over again it will be something we want to do - actually the "doing things we want to do" is the secret to almost everything anyway)

One of the ways to create change in some area of our life (or to stop some repeating pattern) is by creating change somewhere else in our life and one way to figure out a way to do this is to listen to our own language about the situation.

Step 1. Describe the situation to someone else. Or think about how you usually verbalize the situation.

(this is one of Olive's primary jobs here at Olive Bites Studio - she is an amazing listener - if you don't have an Olive, just chat with yourself, that will work, too - don't over-think this, just talk and listen to what you have to say)

I will give a recent story about hubs as an example. George really wants a larger work space. Every other day he said to me, "I need more space".

But he doesn't usually use those words - what he actually says when he is thinking 'I need more space' is "I don't even have room to breathe here."

Step 2. We think about other areas of life where he doesn't have room to breathe

Since what he is saying is an actual physical thing there are many ways we had to work with this.

He now takes 10 minutes a day and does some deep belly breathing.

We use a laundry service for his shop uniforms and he really needs to go up a size on the pants waistband department (especially in the winter when he wears a lot of layers) but because they charge to set up a new size, he never does this. So, a couple weeks ago I ordered him new uniforms with the size increase - easy enough for me to tailor them later.

He started walking around the backyard every night after work (he doesn't go out back much in the winter and I notice this "need more space" feeling hits him hardest in the winter).

We moved our bed so his side isn't near any furniture or walls. I got a small fan for his desk.

Right away he started to notice he didn't feel as stressed about being cramped at work. I noticed he got rid of some scrap metal he was saving "until the price goes up" and freed up some room in the shop (he had refused to do this earlier).

Now he didn't actually get more space, but by moving the energy in other areas of his life, this energy has to shift, too. It wouldn't surprise me if some actual change to the physical space shows up soon.

Now, if he had found himself saying "I'm cramped here" or "I can't think straight here" or "I'm buried here", etc - then the way we would have changed things and the things we would have changed would be different.

Since everything is connected it makes perfect sense that this works. If we are having trouble starting something new, start something else - something easy, but maybe not too easy. If we are having trouble finishing something then finish something else. If you have trouble with procrastination at work, find something that needs to be done right now in your kitchen and do that and I mean right now, just go and do it. Little changes create big changes. Maybe there are no big changes, just little stuff done over and over again.

So, if something isn't working, maybe try changing something else. See what happens! xo all


DancingMooney said...

I tried to change something, even convince myself I was ready for something new, but the more I got into the something new, the more I just wanted to go back to doing what I was already doing. Haven't you heard me say that before, over and over. LOL. I am all about the re- right now... re-evaluate, renovate, rework... maybe remove some craft supplies I am not using, so I can make room for something else. ha!

We move the bed around in our room at least twice a year. It's the only room in the house that has space for being changed... Sometimes facing a different direction can help you appreciate the space again from a fresh perspective. Good thinking! And the bigger pants too... yah... that.

Catherine Ivins said...

the re's are all good - have to add "re"move to the list! I think the bigger pants is what helped most. I hear you with the over and over! xo

lynn bowes said...

You are always such a good read.
I think I have a girl-crush on you =-)

xo :: lynn

KJ said...

Great timing Cat. I am thinking about what is important to me in a living space. I am in the midst of planning a move back to family (I know, I just got here.) Honestly, this move was never intended to be permanent, the next move is. So, I am, once again getting my life in order and thinking about what I need. Amazingly enough it is not the number of rooms, although I want 1.5 baths. Highest on the list is a gas stove- or a gas line to the kitchen. Beyond those two items everything else is negotiable.

Nancy said...

Wow. I never thought of that. Now I am. Thank you.

Catherine Ivins said...

thanks Lynn (wink), Nancy (hello!) and Kathy!

Kathy- you know you are making me think I am over-thinking our move- we could actually just live somewhere for a couple years and not forever ... that way of thinking just might get us out of here

KJ said...

Okay, couldn't help but reply back Cat. You know if you sell and rent that 1) motivates you to get rid of stuff 2) takes the burden of having to sell in order to move.

You will, however, need to find studio space.

Catherine Ivins said...

We hadn't thought about renting and you know the idea of renting this place out instead of selling makes it feel like it is actually possible - also takes the stress off making a mistake with the move since George is used to driving/walking 6 blocks to work ... I will miss this studio space. That last house we looked at had a huge heated garage that George thought was perfect for me - he couldn't understand why I wouldn't want to spend all my time in a garage with one little window. We need to get on the same page - he waffles between wanting to change his life and not wanting to change his life. I do like the idea of renting though.