When I was growing up we had self-esteem classes in school where we filled our notebooks with everything anyone would ever need to know about us -
they were like little prehistoric facebooks.
These classes were designed to increase our confidence and self-esteem and basically imprint us with the message that
we were OK.
Today, it isn't enough for kids to hear that they are OK- they need to be "special".
(and maybe we are all feeling like this actually)
And parents are encouraged to increase our kids 'self-esteem' by affirming their 'specialness'.
My adorable little niece serenaded me recently with a song she learned in nursery school -
"I am special. I am special. Look at me. Look at me."
(sort of to the tune of the farmer in the dell if you are old enough to remember that one)
I told her that I knew a better song and sang her something like -
"I am nice. I am nice. I promise to stop kicking Aunt Cathy in the face as she tries to put on my shoes because I am nice."
She told me I was mean.
(which I am, so maybe she is special)
Her brother, who is a few years older was insisting I wanted to watch him play video games
(having been advised by him that my own video gaming skills were not quite up to the par of actually being able to play with him)
I tried to drag him away from his controller and do something
with me.
He wasn't going for it.
I tried a new tactic.
"I like to make jewelry" - he glanced up at me wondering where this was going.
"Would you like to watch me make jewelry?"
"Oh, I thought you were going to make me something", he said
"No, I like to make jewelry - would you like to watch me make jewelry?", I repeated.
"Why would I want to watch you do that?"
"Well, why would I want to watch you play video games?"
He told me I was weird.
(which I am, so maybe he is especially astute also)
Of course, I remember when we were kids and my sister and I would drag my mother into our bedroom to watch us do 'gymnastics' on the beds - shouting "look at me, look at me", until my mother, bored and achy with tennis-neck would find some excuse to leave
She could have said something about how amazingly special this all was, but more likely she said something like -
"OK, enough girls, I'm tired of sitting here"
since neither of us became Olympic gymnastic champions, maybe she wasn't the best encourager of 'specialness' - on the other hand we did think we actually had to
do something to warrant an audience.
Of course, playing a video game
is doing something - I sure as hell can't do it very well.
(now we all just go on our Blogs or Facebook or Twitter and announce what we are doing)
Kids today have never known any other world and are certainly not to blame here, but all this 'specialness' is making me a bit uneasy about our future.
(or maybe I have just had too much coffee this morning and am way overthinking this)
* adorable Look at Me print by
The Extent of Silence
I should also add that when I redid my blog the other day I went to set up a Facebook fan page and the name Olive Bites was already being used
(I was thinking what has Olive been up to now?)
and then I realized that
I had set up a fan page almost a year ago and then I forgot all about it!
