hine 1 - So, I finally got a new cable cord for the tv in my studio and since I have been almost television-less for quite a while now
(listening to the radio or books on tape while I work)
I was like a dieter on a chocolate binge last week ....
First, I watched two episodes of
What Not to Wear.
The premise of this show is that the hosts take unsuspecting women and, over the course of a week, teach them how to dress like gay men.
The women get a new wardrobe
(not anything they are ever going to wear again, of course)
out of it and I guess this is why they allow their flaws to be catalogued and closets plundered on national television. I
know I'm not that strong. The second Stacy tried to wrench the Joan Jett t-shirt from my fingers, I would probably set myself on fire.
(confidential to producers- if this is something you would be interested in, please contact me through my agent, ie Olive)
Then I watched 3 episodes of
Wife Swap, 2 episodes of
Montel Williams, 2 days of
Court TV, 2 episodes of
Deadly Women, 2 episodes of
Ghost Hunters, 2 episodes of
I Shouldn't Be Alive, 1 episode of
Dirty Jobs- the list goes on.
As you can imagine my head is about to explode. I think it is time to go junk tv cold turkey.
I will now be watching the
Olympics and the
Dog Show(which has Olive practicing walking very fast with her tail in the air- I haven't the heart to tell her that her own breed- the four letter word that starts with M isn't on the AKC's radar)
so I can refocus and get myself off the tv smack.
Actually, I just remembered that on tomorrow's Montel they will be talking to women who were impregnated by devilish spirits
(which I think is code for Kevin Federline)
and some lady named Zelva (Zelva?) who is afraid of eggplant.
Hmm. I may hold off on my junk tv cold turkey for
one more day.
Whine 2 - Now I promised hubby I would cut back on my posts with his name in them, so to protect his privacy and my blog's future involvement in a marital lawsuit I will just call him Mr. Mystery.
So anyhoo, I went to the movies on Sunday
(yes, we rocked Valentine's Day with the Wolfman, which is a film I totally do
not recommend by the way -
Whine 3)
with Mr. Mystery and - after the movie I went into the restroom in the mall.
(this is where it gets a little gross)