revive. recover. rebuild - or what's a jersey girl do with dirty hair anyway

I can't really write about this yet. It is too raw and unsettled

(and cold and dark here)

but just wanted to post that we are OK.

The pictures on the television do not really do it justice - if you remember the book/movie The Road - that is kind of what does it justice

(except of course happening here in NJ, we all have much cooler hair ... even when it is dirty and tied back with things that resemble bungie cords - yes, we can even rock those).

I grew up at the Jersey Shore and have lived in New Jersey my entire life

(except folks that live here don't call it that - we just call it the beach)

and so has hubs. We were flooded out and evacuated more times than we can remember as kids. George lost an uncle and two cousins when their fishing boat capsized during a storm; his aunt bought cold cuts, swept sand from her floors and had a funeral on her front porch.

She cried later.

Maybe just being in the proximity of an ocean so strong and so powerful can't help but rub off on the people here

(maybe it is our proximity to New York, people there are pretty tough, too)

although I suspect people are people wherever you find them.

We aren't nice. We talk fast. We walk fast. We drive like maniacs. We will beep at you in 1.5 seconds if the light turns green and your car is not moving through the intersection. We have roads called circles where the only rule is there is no rule and whoever doesn't stop has the right of way.

We curse. If you bring your kids to a Jersey diner for breakfast they will most likely learn some words you will not want them repeating at the dinner table (from our kids probably).

But we are kind. We work together. We will give you the shirt off our back and yes, our backs often have tattoos and tan lines (and muscles ... we work hard).

We do what we have to do.

We are mostly all from here or from New York because who the hell would want to move here, so we have roots; the kind of roots that go back generations - roots that can withstand 80 MPH winds actually.

We've heard all the jokes about how classless we are, how funny we talk, about turnpike exits and polluted air and we laugh right along with everyone because the less anyone knows about how freakin' beautiful it really is here, the more likely we are to have this place all to ourselves. 

That's all I have to say today - I am making myself ferklemped and here in Jersey we cry later. If you are from these parts you know what this is. If you don't, you might if you watch Chris's video:



(the freestanding house in this video used to be a block in from the beach on a road that doesn't exist anymore - the houses on the beach side are ... gone)

NOTE - Maybe one (of many) good things that can come from this is that we can finally get over any need we have to glamorize and dramatize turbulence, the end of the world, death and destruction - ala vampires and zombies and survivalists - let's not focus on this crap anymore - it sucks.

xo everyone - a big thank you to Vinnie and Maribeth for the lentil soup, Harry Potter, offer of a hot shower and internet use to keep Olive biting, Chris for this video, lanterns and the generator and Kella for the barbecue turkey chili and Halloween candy.

Upcycled Hotel Key Necklace - Holiday Gift Countdown Week # 5 -

This week's easy peasy jewelry tutorial turns a vintage hotel room key into a gorgeous little

(well maybe not so little, little is highly over-rated at times anyway)

necklace that your favorite traveler will love.

You will need to hunt down one of those amazing plastic hotel key tags and an old key.

I even found a vintage hotel room do not disturb sign from Etsy seller Papers of Old that makes the perfect little back tag to this piece.

You will need:

 



vintage key
hotel key fob
doodads
chain
jumprings
do not disturb sign

Just drill a hole in the bottom of the fob- add a fancy doodad with a jumpring, add the key to the top hole along with your chain and voila - some excitement for the weary traveler!

Mine is being gifted attached to this wonderful little do not disturb sign - love it!

Manifesting for Makers - Part ll (continued) your message matters

by crankbunny

"everyone wants to change the world - no one wants to change themselves" ... tolstoy

See previous posts in this series HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE

We don't have to look any further than our Presidential election process to see how screwed up each candidate's messages are getting because they have attached themselves to an outcome (ie getting themselves elected).

When we have attached ourselves to an outcome, we want or need for things to end up a certain way

- we will manipulate things to try to make it happen and we will be sad and discouraged when it doesn't and maybe more importantly we will resist what is actually happening.

Letting go means receiving what is happening without resisting  - it's the point of acceptance and appreciation of what is.

It's the very vibration that makes us ready to move into the next vibration.

The space where we are satisfied with what is and eager for what is to come, without the need to know what is coming - that's the place where manifesting happens.

So how do we get to this magical place anyway? Getting there just takes practice and isn't that hard, staying there is harder, but we are probably not really meant to stay there anyway. It's never the achieving at the end that is the greatest teacher - it's always the process. The process is intended to take us to all kinds of alternate places and wonderful (and terrible) adventures - that's it's job.

It helps if you can get to a place of relaxation (exhaustion can work equally well - I know we can all get to that place). Deep breathing and meditation has been a key to me - I can also get to this place through exercise or a day of hard physical work.

So get into a state of relaxation - take time to do nothing. Nada. Zip. Start right where you are. Try to let go of seeking for a moment. Stay put. Just breathe. Just be. Now gently try asking yourself why you are wanting this outcome. Go deeper and deeper with this until you get to the essence of what you are wanting.

(the essence will not be a relationship, money, publicity, travel etc - the essence might be love, security, acceptance, freedom etc)

Let's get back to businessy (why is spell check telling me this is not a word - when are they going to put me in charge of spell check so I can fix the damn thing) manifesting here and let's say I am really stressing because I am invested in getting a certain outcome from an email I sent to a magazine or wanting some kind of publicity that isn't happening.

So when I quietly ask my relaxed self what I really want here maybe I end up with the essence of needing to be accepted or maybe I land on a place of needing to be of service - wherever I land, I land. I don't judge what is coming up - I just look at it in a loving way.

(I find if I imagine this feeling is happening to my child I can get into a non-judgy - spell check you are killing me - loving space with it more easily)

then I look at a space in my life where I already have this essence and I sit in the acceptance of that for a while (getting in the vibration of what we are really seeking helps to reduce our attachment to the outcome of the thing we are trying to control - we eventually come to the place where we can feel that we already have the thing we are seeking) - it's not a quick fix, but if we do this enough we will start to see the same essences over and over coming up for us in all kinds of unexpected places.

If needing to be accepted keeps coming up for example I would start to look at ways I can bring this essence into my life in safe, small bites. I would also begin to recognize this need in myself and have compassion for it (remember the compassion in Part I) - eventually I would come to the place where I have totally accepted myself with no need for any outside acceptance.

(my biography will read "she was unattached" and if you want to read my biography and I can pretty much guarantee you that you don't - it will be available by Harper Collins - is there still a Harper Collins? was there ever a Harper Collins? - I think they published Valley of the Dolls - it may be a Valley of the Dolls kind of biography and I want to be played by Sigourney Weaver, ala Ripley in Aliens, a character I could totally see fitting into a Valley of the Dolls type scenario and who is totally how I see myself minus the automatic weapons ... and the cat)

When we give up control and stop trying to get a specific outcome, when we really get that this is like trying to catch fireflies with oven mitts - we give whatever happens the freedom to bring us happiness without giving it the power to hurt us.

Buddha said that attachment is the cause of all suffering. It can also be a slippery slope toward a loss of integrity (something it is more important than ever to stay in because universal energy is bringing everything hidden up to be dealt with now).

This is getting a bit wordy (.... waiting for spell check - let's just all agree we can add a letter "y" to any word and create an adjective) so I guess this part will be a 3 section so I can tie this into our message as makers - back next time to tie part III up (not in any kind of kinky way- get your minds out of Valley of the Dolls). Have an amazing day all!

Manifesting for Makers - Part ll - your message matters

photograph by pretty petal studio

When Oprah introduced The Secret a few years ago on her show, the glaring, hit you right between the eyes, problem with it was that all the "success" stories on the show

(maybe not all, but I am remembering it was all)

were people making money off The Secret.

Not in a "I am applying these principles and manifesting abundance" kind of way, but in a "I am teaching these principles and charging for my teachings and manifesting abundance" kind of way.

On the one hand this made the whole thing feel quite spammy and scammy, even for a Course in Miracles - inward and outward polarity manifester like myself. It turned me off.

On the other hand this made total sense because this was clearly a message whose time had come,

(the cynics in my life would say due to an entitled, lazy audience who thought this sounded easy)

there was a huge tribe of people open to these ideas.

The success of those people on the show had more to do with their message resonating with the energy at that time and what it would do for others (and the part this 'success' played in their own journey) as it did any particular steps toward manifesting those speakers took and their actual creation (ie end product - book, DVD, etc).

It's the same for us with our makings. It's not the actual makings that count so much

(you can absolutely manifest abundance in your life by producing crap - it happens everyday - but let's not do this because the world doesn't need anymore crap)

it is our experience of ourselves within our makings and how it aligns with others that is the true purpose behind what we do. 

When we connect with that purpose we can create through universal flow; without stress, tightness or attachment to any particular outcome.

Last spring I began to realize (actually someone else had to realize for me) that I had lost my focus and motivation. I didn't feel sad. I just didn't feel any joy - I didn't really feel much (except for a frequent tightness in my chest and solar plexus). I was using words like burn-out and exhaustion to myself - trying to silence the little voice inside me that said "go deeper".

I had felt a definite pull to do something, had it supported by amazing synchronicity and then it didn't seem to work out. I realized this had been my "story" in different areas of my life. I also realized that what the 'work out' part meant (what happy ending was going to satisfy me anyway) was really all in my head.

I knew that even when our creations (everything we do is an act of creation) don't manifest the way we would like them to, there is always a pay-off, providing of course we are not lost in the need for a pay-out.

I knew that it was this need for a pay-out that had me trapped. I also knew that when there appears to be a blockage in our creative affect in the outer world, it is certain there is something wanting our attention in our inner one - knowing this wasn't helping me release it though. I was tired of being a hostage to an outcome.

I will continue Part II later in the week (and connect how releasing our attachment to an outcome frees our message) - have an amazing day everyone! xo