the astrology of Black Moon Lilith's square to Jupiter | removing the curse, a chance to heal childhood wounds and shame through self-acceptance - part I



Black Moon Lilith isn't an asteroid or a planet. 


She is the lunar apogee, a geometric point in space that marks the furthest point of the Moon's orbit around the Earth. She is as far as the Moon gets from the Earth. The darkest region of our psyche. 


She moves slowly; spends about nine months in each sign. Not to be confused with asteroid Lilith in your chart, she does embody the essence of the Goddess Lilith though. Lilith was Adam's untameable first wife. She wanted equality/wouldn't play second fiddle and was tossed from the garden/vilified. Another demonized Goddess.


So, we all carry this soul memory/wound that plays gracelessly on repeat. This space where we were tossed from the garden. This space where we were shamed for wanting something we were perfectly entitled to want. 

The space where shame turns to awkward action. The space where shame turns to anger.  

(think about the astronomy/astrology - the Moon gets as far away from the Earth as possible, but is pulled back into orbit by gravity - no escape!). 


There aren't enough likes/thumbs up/hearts in the universe to heal our Lilith wound. The wound is only healed through self-acceptance.


I don't see BML, other than in Scorpio or the 8th house or maybe in aspect with Pluto, as innately related to sexuality. Some astrologers do. You can make up your own mind about this.

For the last few weeks Black Moon Lilith has been in Cancer and squaring/shadow-boxing with Jupiter in Aries. 


This is a great gift to us that kind of feels like a kick in the teeth (so maybe just a gift to our dentist, we will have to see how this all plays out). 


Now that we've moved into Cancer season with the Sun, Mercury and Venus set to meet up with BML over the next few weeks, the wound/gift/kick in the teeth becomes even more important to unpack. This will be in play until late July when Jupiter will slow down for his retrograde and Lilith will move on.


With Black Moon Lilith squaring Jupiter in Aries - the wound/shame/anger AND THE ENERGY WE NEED TO HEAL THIS THROUGH SELF-ACCEPTANCE (Jupiter/Aries what better energy for self-acceptance, especially right now with Mars in Aries, too) ARE CONNECTED. Yes, the connection is through a challenging square, but squares (think of the way pressure makes diamonds here) get more done than smooth trines or sextiles, which are easy to miss, and this is Lilith we are talking about!

So, two things are happening with Black Moon Lilith in the sign of Cancer (home, family, mother, motherhood, our roots/tribe) squaring Jupiter for WEEKS - 1. we are all working through childhood wounds and wounds around home/mother/children and 2. our natal Black Moon Lilith is mega- ACTIVATED through tension. If you have a natal BML in aspect to Jupiter or the Moon, or 4th or 9th house this is probably all the more powerful and intense.


We have the collective childhood wound AND the personal wound (which will also connect back to childhood/past-lives/ancestral DNA) - activated/enlarged/ripe for healing. Black Moon Lilith in Cancer can bring a sensitivity to areas of our emotions that we have not been able to express before. Squaring Jupiter in Aries this expression may come out in over-the-top/angry ways, especially if we are just reacting and not responding. Her connection to Jupiter can also provide an outlet of optimism/faith in ourselves and a benevolent universe that was lacking when the wound was created. This is how we start responding instead of reacting. We can find/own our own wound/fear – what we’ve projected onto our family/tribe that they have also projected onto us – and realign with it.


The Lilith in Cancer wound (very powerful since Lilith is a lunar archetype) speaks of being shamed for being needy/dependent. 


For desiring mothering, home, family, stability. Lilith in Cancer can interact awkwardly with these themes. Uncomfortable being dependent even when the situation is totally appropriate. An awkwardness with motherhood/mothering or being mothered (it's not a coincidence the United States. a Sun Cancer country has a baby food shortage with Black Moon Lilith in Cancer and Roe vs Wade up for dismissal). An inability to ask for or accept help. Sometimes an anger at people who can. Wounded or angry mothers or a lie/lying connected to mothers/mothering/home (I see the 'lie' connected to Lilith's refusal to 'lie' beneath Adam, her very essence linked to that word for centuries, words are s-p-e-l-l-s, people, use yours carefully, and also the "lie" that had Lilith going from a protector of babies to a feared killer of babies). This can also apply to Lilith in aspect to our natal Moon or Lilith in the 4th house. There are an unlimited number of ways this can play out, but the bottom line is extremes of behavior that is a result of being shamed for being needy. 


And, of course babies/children are needy. With Lilith, the shame is always about something we are perfectly entitled to want, this is why it gets all twisted with awkwardness and anger. 

The wound's connection to Jupiter for the last few weeks and over the next month through a challenging square is designed to help us see this, work with this, maybe even help heal this. And if our inner child has been seriously wounded to the point of immobility (we don't even know what we want anymore), this square can help us get ourselves moving again.

Jupiter went into Aries back on May 9th just as Mercury stationed retrograde - we were going back to go forward. Black Moon Lilith was already in Cancer - bringing her special kind of "pissed off Danger Will Robinson" energy into our space of home/family. 


Jupiter has been chasing her ever since. But catching Lilith is tricky this summer and Jupiter never will. The BML/Jupiter square doesn't reach exactness/perfection. Whether this becomes a nagging thing we never get resolved (we can still learn from this, not everything gets tied up with a big red bow and that's ok) or we do get some kind of conclusion here (knowledge is power at the very least) - this starts to unwind when Jupiter slows to retrograde and then stations at the end of July. 


Lilith, as always, keeps moving.

In the meantime, the Jupiter square will attract situations or enlarge situations that create tension/frustration. Our feelings about dependence and neediness may come up. Shame around wanting a home/family/to be mothered or be a mother. Shame around wanting safety and security. The wounds we carry from our wounded mothers. The ways we have wounded our own children. Without work we are probably only able to accept ourselves to the degree we were accepted by our parents. And they are only able to accept themselves to the degree they were accepted by their parents. And so on. And so on. Cancer also rules tribes and countries. 


(this shame around neediness, the mother wound that creates narcissism among other things, is maybe our most ancient wound)

Jupiter in Aries provides an infusion of confidence and optimism and energy. The Lilith wound is healed through self-acceptance and here is our largest planet in the sign of the 'self'. I can't tell exactly how this will play out for each of us, but the square's rough edges will force change/adjustments/action. 


Maybe if Lilith didn't get unconditional love from God, we can't get unconditional love from our parents (even if they give it), can't give it to ourselves. These kind of shadow energies, feelings we don't want to deal with, squeeze out in all kinds of awkward, uncomfortable, passive-aggressive and angry ways. With Black Moon Lilith in Cancer all kinds of childhood wounds will come up to be looked at/worked through. The wound itself created a kind of 'seed' of fear that we have been growing in the dark and carrying with us like an old suitcase (and yes, you can imagine it with tentacles ripping through the torn leather seams).


If we can see our original behavior for what it is (perfectly logical at the time), forgive OURSELVES, offer ourselves compassion/understanding, maybe we can eliminate the worn out/awkward ways we have of responding emotionally. At least, through astrological study, we will take the first step -  we will notice them. Next month when Mercury hits Black Moon Lilith on July 9th and again on July 27th when Venus does, we will be better able to deal with whatever is going on. We likely can't totally heal our wounded child/old childhood hurt, but we can stop re-enacting these painful stories through unconscious emotional reactions and start responding in more conscious and healthier ways.

If anyone is interested in investigating their personal Black Moon Lilith wound, I would like to give some examples here on the blog. I used to do this here more regularly, but haven't done this in awhile. They will be written about publicly, but anonymously (without your name, birthdate, etc, nothing will identify you) - just send me your birthdate, place and time via email to with a heading about Black Moon Lilith. Send the email within a couple days.


If I have done anything with your chart, I may have this information on file. Expect the write ups to appear here on the blog within a few days in Part II. How many I get to will depend on how many requests come in.


And we will finally unpack the Depp/Heard charts in part III (the mother wound, fall of women from Goddess to demon, releasing rage against men) - also look at ways to remove the curse, offer ourselves compassion and self-acceptance, to grieve the past and move on because there is a cornucopia of opportunities for a new life waiting to replace our old one. 


And big changes are coming.

xo all


I should add Black Moon Lilith is a complicated archetype/energy - she can't be reduced to a 'wound', obviously, but seeing the root of her/our, often destructive and self-destructive behavior in this way is incredibly helpful. 


artwork by the amazing Svetlana Belova

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